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The Warrior Within

Sometimes, there are aspects of our personalities that can either be a Godsend or a hendrance; it all depends on the situation. For me, I find that managing my inner warrior is a HUGE challenge.
First of all, the problem is that over the past few years, I've actually felt somehow obligated to tamper down aspects my strong personality and intellect. So many insecurities and subtle manipulative pressures encouraged me to be, well, less me.

The result as been disastrous, a pitiful attempt to crush my own spirit when my soul continuously demands to sing, to be heard, to communicate. It's my calling to use my words to connect with as many people on this planet as I can, and instead of listening to it, I've been hiding from myself and have been mad at the world for not taking the time to search for me.

It's a good feeling to rediscover my innate talents, embrace my raw imperfections, the very fallacies that make me so vulnerable and bring-it-on at the same time. No, I'm not perfect, but I OWN my shortcomings. Surely, I recognize them, and I strive to improve myself daily, but I will not – and should not – feel obligated to apologize for simply being human.

For the longest time, I've tried to convince myself that the Warrior within me lay dormant, sleeping under the sedative effects of self-inflicted suppression. Now, I know that she has always been awake, wide awake – but simply biding her time and growing stronger. 

I'm not quite certain what battles lie ahead, but for now, I'm content knowing that at the moment, I'm no longer battling myself.

They say that garlic is an aphrodisiac…

… But still, the only reason why I have no qualms about buying these garlic-infused olives is because hubby and I have been together for almost 17 years, lol. #Romancelivessomewheredeepintheheartofagarlicclove

Bon Appetit!

Falling in Love Again

You know how it is – when you fall in love for the first time, you want it to last forever. To a certain extent, you EXPECT it to last a while. After all, you've invested a lot of time, emotions, and commitment to the relationship. Even when times are tough, you somehow find too many reasons to stay instead of leaving and starting over again.

But what happens when your relationship ends? When you realize that your life would be so much better to let everything go and head into another direction?

We found ourselves in a similar situation when we moved to SoCal last week. After breaking up with Berkeley, we started a new relationship with San Diego. Now we're just going to enjoy the honeymoon phase with the hopes that it will last a long time.

There is romance in everything, even the mundane. Nothing is more attractive than waking up to a brand new day knowing that you get to live your life exactly the way it is. Presently, I feel this way. So, here's to new adventures, relationships, and falling in love again.

Suggestions: What do you think?

I'm looking into developing some light sketches for plots that I can use in my new series. I'm creating a novella series (light, PG-rated romance) geared towards young adults, i.e. circa 15-33 years old.

The first one takes place around Christmas time, and the second one will have something to do with Valentine's Day. I like having about 6 books per series (whenever possible, though 5 would be alright as well), and I want each book to revolve around a holiday.

Now I need your help. What other holidays should I concentrate on, and what makes a specific holiday special to you?

I'll be sure to reply to every comment. Thanks for your input!

Finding Home

In two days, I drove almost 600 miles with my toddler to finally get to our new home. My husband drove behind us, lugging some huge-ass Uhaul and all that remains of our precious earthly belongings.

We're starting over. Again.

It's not that we were planning on relocating less than four years after we had then relocated from Europe. When we moved to Northern California, hubby and I thought that this was it. We were in a good place, had excellent paying jobs, and we had already selected the school where we knew we wanted our future offspring to attend. Everything was perfect, until it wasn't.

Our decision made itself for us. Sure, we initiated it, and then prayed like hell that something would land… Once that happened, everything else fell into place, just like a gentle rain falling on seedlings that have been given a chance for new growth.

I'm excited. This time, it feels right – I dare say even more right than it felt almost 4 years prior. So, here's to hope (that stubborn thing that I never can seem to shake); here's to new beginnings and the fruition of old dreams, and here's to finally, finally, finally finding home.

Three in the Bed, and the Little One Said…

…Nothing, but just kicked Papa in the throat and punched Mama in the kidney to ensure getting more space in the bed.

Apparently, the little one in the song who kept saying "Roll over, roll over" was an exceptionally polite child.

Gotta love traveling long distances with a little toddler.

Bubbles in Berkeley

For the child in all of us.

We spent hours entertaining our toddler child and niece by blowing bubbles. The most beautiful part was seeing the pure joy on their faces, and hearing their innocent, highly contagious giggles.

The best part was when those bubbles would float to random adults in the area. Just seeing how each person burst into smiles or even laughter was so heartening.

We might try to suppress our inner child, but that little one is always ready to make a reappearance. Why fight it?

Decadence Overload

Okay, so I've already established that I'm a foodie, and life in the San Francisco Bay Area has been very good to me. Now that I'm relocating to nearly South of the Border in San Diego in just a few days, I've taken it upon myself to bid farewell to my favorite restaurants.

My waistline will hate me for this, and I'm sure that I'll be hitting play on BOD more frequently than ever, but for now, I indulge. Yesterday was Italian; tomorrow is sushi. I ate one of my favorite subs with the ever-famous "dirty sauce" today…

Actually, if I re-read my own blog entry months down the road and I ask myself why I can't get rid of the last stubborn 10 (*ahem* 15) pounds, I will look to this past month and know EXACTLY why.

Crap, I think I need an intervention.

Approval Ratings

These days, it's most important to be super active in social media. Despite being a Millennial, I am SO OLD-SCHOOL; it's a shame. Honestly, I'm an old soul. I adore and studied classical music and theatre, and I love a good book more than chocolate. (Now you know that's true love). I've been encouraged to write professionally since my late teen years, but the call to the stage superceeded. At this point in my life, though, I know that it's time to put pen to paper – and it's a fantastic feeling.

But then, there's this huge monster, called "Social Media", and we have to channel so much of our creative energy in its direction in order to showcase our other inner treasures. It demands much of your attention, and if you have time for your other offerings, then congratulations. But more and more, it feels as though I should be seeking more "likes" than new characters…

I'm not saying that I have a huge problem with social media – clearly, I'm a fan and a greedy consumer. But I do miss the romanticism of sitting down in a quiet place, simply writing, and focusing on letting my stories tell themselves. But without social media, who would I be telling my stories to?

Stock Photo

Letting Go

In so many ways, it can be a good thing. Letting go. It sounds so simple to me, so freeing and light. I tend to associate letting go with the elements – earth, wind, fire, water. It's cleansing the mind, body, and spirit at the same time. 

In preparation for our big move, I am able to let go of so many things in ways that I hadn't really anticipated while packing. Things that once held such significance for me in previous years barely register as being relevant to my life now. On the other hand, there are other things, small items like a butterfly clip or a little keychain, that carry with them so much love and memories; I will not ever let them go. 

I think that in my next stand-alone novel, I want to explore the challenge and the freedom of letting go. Love has a tendency to present the opportunity to "let go" in so many relationships, both platonic and romantic. I'm excited to see where this goes. 


Slacking Off

So, now that I've finally walked away from a very trying period in my professional life, I am given some miraculous vacation time to recouperate. Seriously, this must be what winning the lottery feels like, because I wake up each morning totally blissed out. 

Even though it's awesome in so many ways, in terms of productivity, I totally feel the inspirational "slump".  I'm certain that you know what I'm talking about; it's when you still have a mile-long To Do list, but when you have the opportunity to just sit and Do Nothing, then you totally take that option. That's well and good, but I still have deadlines to meet, chapters to write, *ahem* plots to develop. 

Despite knowing all of this and being aware that as each day that passes, that means my list is getting longer and time is getting shorter, my brain is DEMANDING that I chill the hell out before creating anything else. 

It's amazing how the body will force you to take care of yourself. Thanks, Mother Nature!

San Francisco Bay Area: Break of Dawn


I'm adding this image to my blog to share with you a wonder that I've been fortunate to see almost daily for some time. There is so much power, wonder, inspiration, and even a little bit of romance in this particular snap shot; it was even more beautiful than the camera could capture. #California

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